Our Unexpected November

Before Life Changed:

For about two weeks I had not been feeling well. Headaches, chest pain... But Tylenol was working and I was sleeping okay. On Friday night, the 22nd, the Tylenol stopped working and I was very uncomfortable for most of the night. I even got sick twice and couldn't keep any food down. In the morning Gabe wanted me to check my blood pressure. It had been great the whole pregnancy, so I had stopped checking it way back in July! But, sure enough, it was very high. 151/98

Being a Saturday morning, we called the 24 hour nurse help line at Kaiser. They were very nice and  transferred us over the Labor and Delivery (the only pregnancy help there on a Saturday morning). The nurse on the phone wanted us to come in and get checked out. Gabe and I were there by 9:00am.

We got checked in and taken to a room. The nurse with us needed to get the basic tests from me, but I could barely pee in the cup for her. She took over the little I gave her and Gabe and I settled in for what we thought would be a few hours of tests, some blood pressure meds, then sent home.

That night, 23rd, was Gabe's "big" birthday dinner with his buddies. They had a big night ahead of them with bbq and beer! We really thought we would be out of there by mid afternoon. (We ended up celebrating Gabe's birthday very differently!) 

I was able to pee a little bit more for the nurse and she took the rest of the sample to the doctor. We flipped on the TV and started to watch Willy Wonka (the original!) in our room. About 20min later, the doctor came in the room, greeted us and said something that will stay with Gabe and I for the rest of our lives,

"Things are going to start moving very fast."

She then went on to tell us that I had Preeclampsia  http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pre-eclampsia with the rare paring of HELLP syndrome http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/HELLP_syndrome. These two are not only dangerous to me, but also to our little Rosemary.
A C-section was the only way to insure both her safety and mine.

This hit Gabe and me like a ton of bricks. I wasn't due until mid-late January (My due date was Jan 25th, but she was measuring to about Jan. 16th.) Either way... we were not ready. Gabe allowed himself to process this news, I however jumped from "everything's fine" to "Let's do this!" in a matter of seconds. I knew that if I thought about it too much it would overwhelm me and stress me out even more.

At this point Gabe and I started calling family and friends to be praying. We didn't want our family to come down yet, (they told us it could be up to 8 hours before I could have the c-section) and didn't want them to have to wait around...
They are all bad listeners and within the hour they were all on their way. We are forever grateful for their bad listening skills. :)

We were on hold for a little bit to make sure the hospital had blood platelets in the building, because of my low blood platelet level, (normal is about 150. Mine were at 51.) Thankfully, they had some and I would be ready for the c-section by about 1pm.

Because of the chance of the seizure, I had to be put completely under. This sadly also meant Gabe couldn't be in the room. Like I said before... Didn't want to think too much about what we would be missing.

I was given a few different meds to prep for the c-section, kissed Gabe, and was wheeled into the OR. The last thing I remember was the doctor telling me to take slow deep breaths.

On Saturday, November 23rd, at 1:51pm our little Rosemary Luna came into the world, screaming her head off. (They told us that's a good thing.) Born at 31 weeks along. 9 weeks early. 

By 2pm I was in recovery and by 2:30 I got to look at my little girl for the first time. (Sadly I don't remember any of this... thank God for pictures!) That night I was finally able to process what we had been through. I was finally able to get in a good cry and let out all the stress.

The family came in to celebrate with us and Rosie and I started our road to recovery.

Gabe was checking in on Rosemary every few hours. The first day was really rough because they had to take my vitals every hour. Yes, they had to wake me up every hour and check me out. Because of the medication they had me on, I couldn't leave my room, but by the next day at 1pm, they took me off of that one medication and I was able to walk down the hall to see our new little girl. 

Finally getting to hold my Rosemary was like nothing I had ever experienced before! The joy Gabe and I felt made all the stress, pain, and fear melt away. For me, that is when the healing could begin. Peace had come.

Our first family photo! (She is hooked up to a c-pap breathing mask. At 31 weeks, this is standard for preemies.)

This is Life:

Gabe and I now go to the hospital every day. We are watching little Rosie get stronger and stronger. They tell us she may even be home by Christmas! (A whole month before her due date!) She is now off the IV and breathing on her own. She is getting breast milk from a donor and soon I will be making enough to feed her.

Rosemary and Daddy! 

They took her off the c-pap breathing mask after 2 days! 

Rosemary and Mommy! Then they took her off the breathing tube completely a few days later! So Strong!   

The nurses made a Thanksgiving card FROM Rosemary for us! Best card ever!!! 

 Gabe and I are learning how to change the diaper of a 3 1/2 lb baby! We are getting better. (Rosie is not impressed...) 

She has a nice strong grip too and loves to hold our fingers. 

Rosemary Luna: 11 days old! 

Rosemary Luna is doing great! She still has a feeding tube, and will until she can multitask eating, swallowing, and breathing at the same time. (They tell us that starts around the 33/34 week mark.) We were able to bring in clothes for her to wear this week too! Who knew seeing your baby, looking like a "baby" would be such a big deal! As she gets stronger and stronger every day, it's getting harder and harder to leave her.

We are so thankful for so much. The day she was born couldn't have gone smoother and the nurses and doctors could not have been more patient or helpful. Our friends and family are the best! Each and every one of their visits, notes, phone calls and texts made this time that much easier to handle.

We know Rosemary is in wonderful hands. Once she is strong enough, we'll be over joyed to take her home. Until then, we know she is in the right place, getting the best care she can!

Grow Strong and Brave baby girl. We pray for you every day and thank God for His blessing in our lives. We'll see you soon.

Pregnant vs. Zombies: Our Thank You!

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Our Gender Reveal Party! Milk N Cookies Style

We decided to have a Gender Reveal party with our family and close friends, to celebrate our little one! Normally I don't consider myself a trendy person, but I really like this idea. Not to mention, my mom is one heck of a party decorator! Our big sonogram appointment was on Tuesday and we planned the party for that Saturday.

I had seen so many cute ideas for parties and decided to go with a black and white themed "Milk n Cookies" party. That way, once we cut the cake, the color (pink or blue) would really pop! 

My awesome mom, and our awesome neighbor Sjaan, made this late August, backyard party totally come to life!

My mom made mini bow ties and tutus for people to clip on as they arrived.



I also printed out copies of our sonogram for family to take home, if they wanted.

Our little one! In her first official photo shoot!


I put together an "Old Wives Tales" gender prediction board to help people make a good guess.

My mom also had this very cute maternity dress made for me. (She even stuffed her dress form with a pregnant belly!) So cute!
Dress made by:
Maria Saenz, Fashion and Costume Design
562)429-8637
Long Beach, CA

Mom used black and white wrapping paper as table runners. Then just had small wire baskets with white flowers as centerpieces.

The party was mainly dessert! (yum!) Cookies, black and white candies, wine and, of course, CAKE!

(She also used old antique milk bottles for the milk. But, being that the temperature still felt like 90 at about 7pm that night, we kept them in the fridge until we cut the cake. Sadly, I don't think we got a good picture of their cuteness.)

 The black and white really came together with this backdrop too! I LOVE the homemade banner and the pinwheels are accented with antique buttons!
http://greenweddingshoes.com/diy-pinwheel-table-runner/ (This has the best DIY for the pinwheels)

My awesome husband and I had a chance to look around before everyone arrived.

Gabe wrote a whimsy and beautiful sonnet for our little one. This was one of the most special things about our little party. We had the sonnet also written in frosting around the cake!









You can read the sonnet here.
https://www.facebook.com/groups/530125260378456/doc/566707373386911/

Our Black and White Gender Reveal Cake! 

The cake turned out better then expected! I truly LOVE how every part of it worked with the theme of the night. We went through our favorite bakery in Los Alamitos, CA Great Dane Baking Co. They are very personal and have beautiful cakes!  http://www.greatdanebakingcompany.com/

The moment came and it was time to slice into our future! With about 30 of our closest family and friends looking on, we cut the cake and found out we are having a ....

GIRL!!!! 

Side note:

The options I gave the baker were Red Velvet cake for a girl, or Blue Velvet cake for a boy. Gabe was thinking "pink or blue" cake, so when he saw the dark maroon color of the red velvet cake he didn't know WHAT to think! He cheered with me and then leaned over and whispered "that means 'girl' right?" I felt bad for not filling him in before hand, but we had a good laugh about the whole thing. Oops!  :) 

The night turned out perfect and I am so thankful for all our friends and family that made this night possible. Having everyone there, to experience this moment with us, is truly a once in a life time thing. Gabe and I feel blessed by everyone in our lives! We know our little girl is going to be joining a colorful community of people who love her so much! Here's to the future and here's to our little girl!

(And as of today, we will call her Rosemary!) 

Halfway There!

Four Month and Two weeks!

Tomorrow will mark the halfway point of my pregnancy. I am proud to admit that I am finally getting the hang of the "bun in the oven" thing. The first three+ months were rough, but now I am feeling good and getting more excited by the day!

Even though the first trimester was tough, it didn't stop Gabe and me from having fun! Being that the beginning of my "new week" was on Saturdays, I started doing my pregnancy progression pictures when I was all dressed up, ready for whatever the weekend had in store for us. (Parties, weddings, etc...)

 Ten Weeks! 

 I didn't really have anything to show off at the 10 week mark, but I was clearly excited to get things going!
Our friends had a super BBQ weekend. We grilled burgers and had a great kickoff to the summer!

Eleven Weeks!                    

The Costume Masquerade Ball!
http://www.labyrinthmasquerade.com/

Yes! On the 11 week mark Zyggy joined Gabe and me at our very first Masquerade Ball! The Labyrinth Ball of Jearth is a giant party in LA that is based on the masquerade ball in the 80's cult film 'Labyrinth', with David Bowie (such a great movie!) Our friend was performing at the event and she put us on her guest list! Up until this point my nausea/exhaustion were cramping my style, but this night I was feeling great. Gabe and I even stayed at the party past midnight! (That's big for a girl who had been going to bed around 8pm!)
The night was amazing!

Thirteen Weeks! 

July 20th was not JUST the day our friend celebrated her 30th with an awesome Great Gatsby style party... We also started the day at 6am with a yard sale at my parents house, then I went to a delightful afternoon tea for another friends birthday!
It's true, our friends know how to do a Saturday right! Our night ended under the stars with some beautiful people, drinking Old Fashions (Gabe) and laughing the night away.
This was also the debut of my maternity clothes! I have had three awesome friends give bags of their awesome clothes. This was the first night in weeks I felt good about what I had on!

Fifteen Weeks! 

This week (not technically a Saturday) I helped out with our churches' week long summer day camp! The VBS was Superhero themed and yours truly MC-ed the days events as their resident superhero named Joyful Noise! In good, ol'fashion Imagination Machine style, we sang silly songs, danced around and played all week long. I sported my purple wig, rainbow socks, diy cut and ribboned t shirt and my Wonder Woman gold cuffs. We had an awesome week of loving these kids and teaching the word of God.

Sixteen Weeks! 

Heather and I are about two weeks apart. Both in birthday and in pregnancy! We became friends when we were in 1st grade at Life Center Church in Lakewood. We both have birthdays in January and over the years we have had many mid January birthday parties together. Now our Little ones will ALSO have January birthdays! Go Team January! Heather and Britton found out they will be having a boy!
This was their Gender Reveal party. And LOOK! I have a little belly now!

Seventeen Weeks!

 Our friends Danesh and Hannah had a beautiful Persian wedding last weekend. Wearing the right thing to a wedding is always a fun/stressful event in itself, but add a pregnant woman to the mix, who can't fit into any of her favorite party dresses and you can start to imagine my stress. I had been worried about this outfit for MONTHS! Finally, the week before the wedding, my friend Audrey came in to save the day! When I told her what I was looking for she took me to her closet and handed me this totally perfect (and so comfy) boho dress. The wedding was beautiful and then we danced and danced and danced, then I sat down and Gabe continued to dance and dance and dance. (There was a lot of dancing...)
:)




Little Zyggy has already joined us on so many wonderful adventures over the last four and a half months. I start back to work next week and soon Zyggy will add improv performer to the list as well!

Next week we find out the sex of our little Zyggy. I am now waking up in the middle of the night smiling, just thinking about all the fun we will have. Boy or Girl, I truly don't care. (I change my mind daily.) I am so blessed by the beautiful people in our life. I know our little one will be joining an amazing group of family and friends. Actors, artists, teachers, missionaries, and lovers of God. All of whom live life to the fullest.

Amber and the 1st "Mester-of-Tri"

I am now 13 weeks pregnant, as of Saturday the 20th. Thus ending my first trimester of yuckiness. To be honest, it wasn't that bad. I have been hearing one of two stories from the lovely moms in my life.

10 Weeks! 

Stories from the Other Mothers!
1st Trimester Story #1: I LOVED every minute of life! I woke up every day as if there was a rainbow coming out of my belly and I can't wait to got to work, or clean the house or make dinner for my family! Only 207 days to go! *ugh*

1st Trimester Story #2: I lost 15 lbs in 2 months, but not in a good way... You see, I couldn't keep any food down, had to take medication just to go to work every day. And I was hospitalized for a few days because the baby and I weren't  getting enough nutrition. Oh, and I hate life. *double UGH* 

So when I started feeling icky at about 8 weeks I was worried. Thank goodness my "morning" sickness was more of an afternoon/evening sickness. Making work nice and easy and dinner time touch and go. I had already started taking my prenatal vitamins at bedtime, and I believe that may have helped a little. My bedtime however has become that of an 80 year old and by 8pm every night I have been ready to hit the hay. The only real problem I had with this evening sickness was going out with friends. Naps have always been apart of my life and I truly think they helped me conquer the nights with our awesome friends.
Gabe and I were so proud of ourselves when I made it to MIDNIGHT the night of the Ball of Jareth in early July. Infact, I think there were only a one or two things I had to miss out on, due to the sickies.

Masquerade Ball of Jareth, July 6th. 

11 weeks pregnant! 

They say that every woman is different and I am very thankful we are. It's a truly unique experience and I am waking up every day with new emotions, aches, pains and joy. I have some beautiful friends who have given me some super cute maternity clothes and I am excited to begin to grow into them. The last two days have been nice. No night sickness and I even feel like I have more energy already!

13 Weeks! (And going to our friends Great Gatsby party!) 

They say the 2nd trimester are the "Rock Star" months. I am very excited to see how rock star I can become! *wink*

Doctor Visit #1 "It's a Peanut!"

Thursday was my first Dr. appointment. I was very anxious and didn't sleep very well the night before. I got there right on time and, surprisingly, was seen within about 15 min! Shocked! The nurse, Miss Lily was there to check me in and take all the usual tests. My blood pressure was a little high, like usual, so she took it twice. Once in the room, Dr. Ihara and Miss Lily got the ultrasound machine set up and away we went!
Dr. Ihara wanted to do a vaginal ultrasound. From what I have heard from others, many times you only get to hear the heartbeat on the first visit. But with the vaginal ultrasound, it's a guaranteed visual! Show me that peanut! I was definitely excited.
I saw little Zyggy first on the monitor. Dr. Ihara then pointed out the pumping hartbeat on the screen. "There's your little peanut!", said Miss Lily. Then he turned up the sound and...

This is one of the coolest things I have ever heard in my life! 

I teared up, then asked if I could record it for Gabe. Dr. Ihara told me that it's really not allowed, but he would let me anyway. Nice guy, my doctor. :)
Everything else at Kaiser went as planned. I was out of there about an 1 1/2 later.

Now that I have seen AND heard our little baby, it's so much more real! Things are falling into place and there is a peace that has come over me. I pray every day for our little one's health and safety, but I know our little Zyggy is in God's hands.

Tears for Fears

I read that 50% of all pregnancies are unplanned. We had been trying since Fall of 2012 to get pregnant, so we are definitely the other 50%.
That being said; Telling a newly pregnant, first time mom that she has to wait until week 8 to see a doctor is cruel! It almost makes me wish I didn't know I was pregnant for the first 7 weeks or so!
It has been officially ONE WEEK since we found out we were pregnant. In these seven days I have gone from totally ecstatic to crippled with terror and back again. (Maybe more than once...) I will say that so far, this new mom has fared well in the symptoms world. Not really any nausea. No headaches. My body is a little sore, but nothing too uncomfortable and I am sleeping through the night! Yay! But, mood swings are now normal.

One week before I took my pee test I was on the computer. I clicked on a video link of Disney's Merida from "Brave" being inducted into the Disney Princess Royal Court. (I'm a Scottish princess fan.) As the video went on, they finally introduced Princess Merida to the crowd. Then her mother came out to crown her. It was all very cute and silly, with cheesiness oozing from every moment. And before I could laugh at the other princesses silly descriptions of themselves, "Arial, always curious. Bell, a quest for learning..." I found myself SOBBING the moment Merida's mother placed the crown on her head and they hugged. Sobbing. *sigh* It only made matters worse when Gabe came over to ask me what I was watching and if I was okay. My first thought was "If I am not pregnant, this is the most embarrassing moment ever!!!

Want to see how silly I should feel about crying? Watch it and then laugh at me yourself!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yPE5lVHucG4

The Monday after we found out, we were both back to work. I had a long day in West Covina. My cast was mostly on time and we began setting up for our assembly. I had decided not to tell my cast until June, just incase...
As we were getting ready to start rehearsal, one of my actors jumped down, off the stage onto some risers below. They clanged loudly and I snapped "Don't break the risers!" He then, being a funny guy, snapped back, "You calling me fat, Amber?" (Now, I knew he was just joking with me) I started to say no. I think I tried to explain that the sound was loud, and the next thing I knew tears were flowing down my face and I was telling them all I was pregnant and I didn't feel good! Ha! All of 10 min of keeping a secret. They were all super cute and cheered and gave me a big hug.

Since Monday, I have been feeling good. Like I said, very few symptoms. But being a FTM, that isn't always the most comforting thing. I keep reading and hearing about how sick everyone else felt at this point. Not sleeping, peeing all the time, and headaches. On Thursday morning I had my first mini breakdown. As I was reading our "You, Having a Baby" book, I couldn't take it any more. I was overwhelmed and scared and didn't understand why I didn't feel pregnant! Tears started to flow again and before I knew it, my beautiful, hero of a husband was right there. He held me and then looked me right in the face and told me not to worry. The tears themselves were the biggest sign of all. It's true, I had never cried this much in my life! (Okay maybe when I was a baby.) To calm myself a little more, I did take one more pee test that afternoon. Still pregnant.  :)

I see the doctor on June 6th. WooHoo!

Telling The Parents!

This has all been very exciting!

Saturday morning we called my mom to ask her and dad if they wanted to have dinner. My dear mother then told me that she was busy cleaning the house all day and that my dad had gone sailing with a buddy to Catalina Island until Sunday. What a bummer! Ha!

We luckily already had plans with Gabe's dad and stepmom for Sunday. That was the easy one!

Gabe's mom was the 1st official parent to know. She was at work and called him on a break. She was thrilled! She told us later that she was so excited later that day, she got on her intercom and told her whole bus about our exciting news. Love that!

I decided I wanted to surprise the rest of the parents with "Grandparent" cards. Being that we are the first in both families to get pregnant, I thought this would be a fun surprise... Just so you know, Grandparent "announcement" cards are HARD TO FIND! I ended up buying grandparent birthday cards, then covering up the Happy Birthday message with our own message:

Robins Baby

Coming January 2014!

At Gabe's parents house, we hid the cards in an old shadow box Gabe had found at his grandfather's house a few summers before. Gabe's dad opened the box with Cindy, saw the cards, and opened them. Roque was still distracted with the box when Cindy burst into tears at the words "Hi Grandma!" on her card. Finally Roque looked at it and then he got it! We all laughed and hugged and cried! Cindy has been a labor and delivery nurse for over 20 years. She is a baby pro!!! I already started picking her brain about birth and other scary stuff. We are so lucky to have them in our lives.

We tried to stop by my parents' on our way home Sunday night. But those butt heads weren't home again! (bummer #2 *wink*) Finally we talked to them Monday and planned to have dinner with them Monday night. This time I hid the cards in an old cigar box and ONCE AGAIN my dad (this time) was distracted by the box and he didn't even LOOK at the card. It wasn't until my mom cried out "Roy! Look at the Card!" did he finally see what was happening. Another round of laughter began and we all hugged and cried and toasted and cried some more. I love them so much!

All of our parents are so wonderful and unique. We are so lucky to have such beautiful people that have shaped us into the people we are today.

The First Day of the Roller Coaster

May 18th, 6:34am

I am a week and a half late, but after seven months of negative tests, I am a little scared to take another one and have been putting it off.
"I'll probably start my period tomorrow..."
I had a late night on Friday with my show and was joking with the cast about maybe being pregnant. This only fueled my fear thinking I was "jinxing" it! (Paranoid, party of one.)

I went to the bathroom, took the test, and sat there on the toilet trying to ignore the blinking of the screen. (the good tests were on sale this time!) I was trying to figure out how to keep myself occupied for three more minutes when I glanced down and saw it.

"Pregnant" 

I pulled myself together, ran into our bedroom, and crawled next to Gabe and whispered in his ear. It wasn't until this moment that I started to cry. :)

The rest of the day was very foggy. We went out to breakfast, then spent a lot of time on the computer. We watched the documentary, "The Business of Being Born" (So good!!!). Then spent more time looking up Birthing Centers. Every hour or so I would hear Gabe say something like "wow" or "this is happening". I also found myself in this state of disbelief.

When I was in High School I made a decision that I didn't want to have kids. I wanted to be a mom, but didn't want anything to do with BIRTH. Nine months of sick, fat, uncomfortable only then to get pain, medication, pain, screaming, grossness and more pain. Yuck! Adoption seemed like a great idea to me! As my friends and I got older their passion for pregnancy grew and mine only seemed to get more terrifying. There was a season where 4 out of the 7 women in my show were pregnant. I would get dizzy just hearing their stories and would have to walk away from every conversation, every day! (Worst year of my life! Ha!)
It was only when I met Gabe and we got married, that I even considered doing this. Having a child with the love of my life seemed like something I could get through. We do still want to adopt and grow our family with children from all walks of life, but we will start off this chapter with one of our very own.

The Roller Coaster:
When you're little, you look up at this great big, giant machine. It is whipping people around. They are fearful, screaming, some even getting sick. You watch in horror as they spin and drop, listening to their cries. But then you focus on their faces, and most of them are smiling. If you listen a little closer, there is laughter along with the screams. And when you step back you see there is a giant line of people waiting to get on this monster of a ride.
It has taken me 29 years to even look close enough to see the good stuff. In October of 2012 Gabe and I got in line. We waited in the line for seven months (long line). And on May 18th at 6:34am, we got on this big scary coaster.

Today is the 19th. I woke up sore and a little uncomfortable and happy.